New Zealand Conservative

To save you time and to allow you to spend the evening in good company with your family - I present a summary of tonight's debate compressed into 119 seconds. Hopefully this preview will help you to make some sense of tonight's event.

Seven more ex-Parrots with the Department of Conservation's latest 1080 poison drop .  Back in 2008 [refer Dead Parrot Sketch ] they managed to knock off seven of the Nestor Notabilis , and another seven shuffle off their mortal coils again.  We only know about it because they were tagged.  Be interesting to see how the others are doing .  Perhaps the bigger question is, was the collateral damage worth it on the war against possum terror?  Still, perhaps it's better than being eaten by an Orca, as is the possible fate of Happy Feet .  Although I'm hoping the glue just wore off and Happy Feet is transponder free and fancy somewhere only slightly colder than Wellington today. Because Wellington today was fairly cold, with hail stones the size of rugby balls .  Well, small rugby balls.  They were thick enough and loud enough to quite possibly freak out the visiting Rugby teams from more tropical climes.  I can just imagine the squads talking...

The Sea Shepherd group says banning Pete Bethune from its Antarctic anti-whaling missions was just a legal strategy during his trial, and the New Zealand activist is welcome to join them on future trips. That is not a "legal strategy", it's actually called "lying". I guess it's the same as Japan hunting whales purely for "scientific purposes". It looks to me like both parties deserve each other.

Mr Key said he thought Tuhoe would get the joke, but it appears they were not amused. Of course they are not amused , he didn't finish with a down trou and a baring of his bum cheeks in their general direction, or taking the Maori flag and shooting it, or offering huge sums of compensation for historical satirical moments. Some good advice for Tuhoe - respect the Pakeha's ability to be irreverent. It's a cultural thing chaps. Dr McAnulty said people should not eat raw slugs or snails and should ensure they wash their hands after touching them. Fair enough. It wasn't on my list of likely activities, but obviously, some people need to be told .

I saw in the paper today some dudes got hammered for attempting to smuggle 13 cute geckos out of New Zealand. That sort of carry on is not permitted in the carry on luggage of an international departure, so these guys face fines and jail time for "this crime against all New Zealanders", as quoted by the Conservation Minister Kate Wilkinson. So that's all great news and a win for justice and stopping criminals etc. But then I read how much loot they expected to make selling 13 Kiwi geckos in Europe. $192,000. Gee Wayne, why aren't we farming them and exporting them?

" I love cats. I love all animals big time. Anyone who knows me knows I love animals, " Even more surprising to me is this Gisborne senior constable Pam Mankelow is related to the accused through her ex-husband. She told Sunday News she couldn't excuse her relative's actions but she could see the incident "from many different sides". "People that don't live in the area, or don't know the people etc, etc, they all have very different concepts of the whole story," she said. Well I don't live in the area but I can't imagine very many people, where ever they might live being anything other than appalled by this story.

More is emerging about this "dog massacre" thing. When this story first emerged I had my doubts - we have had a raft of animal cruelty stories over the past few weeks - stories that churn the stomaches of those of us with normal human empathy. But this one seems different . But thirty dogs being kept by an isolated individual living alone in a truck seems like an out of control situation and when it comes down to it, if they hadn't have been shot its seems highly probable the SPCA or the Police would have eventually have had to do the deed. And if they had how then would have the story been reported? The reality is for human beings to function and prosper in this world we have to kill things and we do it every day. City people can divorce themselves from this reality as they select their shrink wrapped lamb chops from the super market freezer but never-the-less animals die that we may live every day. In any case John Key is going to consider fast tracking legi...

Our blog byline is " Sine dominico non possumus ". I came across a comment from Adolf at No Minister , made back in 2008 : Is it really true? Does your motto actually mean 'No domination without possums?' He wasn't far wrong. Except for the meaning and all. However, it got me thinking how the possum offensive was going in New Zealand, and if I had ever done any posts about 1080 poison. Seems I haven't except for this gem: Mass Murder in the Killing Fields of Fox Glacier and I came across a story early in 2009 about mice deliberately infected with Bubonic Plague under the careful control and extremely high security of some scientists. Until the mice were lost: Of mice and men No domination without possums? Well, it's a plan I suppose.

Dolphins have been declared the world’s second most intelligent creatures after humans, with scientists suggesting they are so bright that they should be treated as “non-human persons”. Hmm, an interesting ethical dilemma. Do we treat them like the unborn, who seemingly have no right to life? Or perhaps like dogs? It was argued that it was against the law to hit a dog, but not a child during the height of the anti-smacking debate. Apparently, dogs had more rights than children. Well, aside from the fact that even if humans aren't always protected by the rights that we have given them, and we seem to be able to apply these rights with a degree of inconsistency, we at least have a measure to argue against. Collectively speaking, I've always thought we have been too err, inhumane, in the treatment of animals, so I wonder what the impact would be to accord non-humans human rights? What's the moral obligation such a move would place on us, collectively. How would that diff...

If a last-minute legal challenge fails, from Tuesday, gun owners in the state of Tennessee will be allowed to carry their weapons in a lot more public places. It used to be that only the bad guys packed. Gunning for a law change "The US budget deficit has moved above $1 trillion for the first time - with three months of the financial year remaining. And last week a senior US Democrat said that legislators must be willing to consider the possibility of a second economic stimulus package." Those Democrats never do things by half do they? "Researchers at the University of Sussex have discovered that cats use a "soliciting purr" to overpower their owners and garner attention and food." Like putty in their paws .

The cartoon was drawn by Andrzej Krauze, a Polish cartoonist living in the UK. Upon learning of the threats from the pro-homosexual groups, he laughed, saying, “This only proves that the cartoon message was correct and that I was able to represent the whole absurdity of so-called civil unions.” He also pointed out that many countries have registered associations of zoophiles and pedophiles that wish to have their perversions legalized. “I am sure that in coming years, some of these groups, especially animal lovers will achieve their goals,” Krauze said. The reference may be to a registered Dutch political party called PNVD, a Dutch acronym that translates into "brotherly love, freedom and diversity,” whose party planks consist of working towards the legalization and acceptance of pedophilia, pornography, bestiality and easy availability of soft/hard drugs. The party also lobbies for private possession of child pornography, the right of children to smoke, drink and vote at the age ...

Negotiations to resume exports of live sheep for slaughter are continuing but Agriculture Minister David Carter says a ban will remain unless they meet the highest welfare standards Ministry of Agriculture - For Immediate Release The Ministry of Agriculture today announced a bold new initiative in livestock management. Sheep and Cows will be exported live, following a bulk berth deal with the P&O Cruise company. P&O have guaranteed 50% of cabins will be available to livestock on all outbound trips, with stop overs in Fiji, New Caledonia and Vanuatu before arriving in Malaysia for slaughter. Under the deal, all ovis and bovine receive a full continental buffet breakfast. Cows, Bison and Buffalo are also provided a light lunch from the "all you can eat" salad bar. David Carter announced that the mix of human and animal on the cruise ship should add to a general relaxed feeling and help create an atmosphere of fun and excitement, so important to animals facing slaught...

The Free Market is great blah blah blah. I agree in general. But does that make it right? Intensive Chicken farming says the free market has its weaknesses. An interesting program on TV right now explains the cruel and sad life of the simple chicken. If I want to eat chicken or eggs, then free range is the way to go. In discussions of morality, ethics and how we treat our fellow man, it all comes down to how we live our lives and how much we care about how others live theirs. I guess we could include chickens in that too. I'm not arguing the life of the chicken is as valuable as a human, and I'm not arguing that we should not eat chicken. I'm suggesting the well formed person cares about cruelty. The gift to man is free will. We have choices to make, and we make good choices and bad choices. Our duty is to learn how to rise above our base and imperfect nature and truly be human. Doesn't that sound quietly stirring? Well, as Hugh discovered, if your chook is...

Location: The Department of Conservation (DoC), Fox Glacier Office A customer enters Customer: 'Ello, I wish to register a complaint. (The Officer does not respond.) C: 'Ello, Miss? Officer: What do you mean "miss"? C: I'm sorry, I have a cold. I thought you were Miss Clark. Anyway, I wish to register a complaint! O: We're closin' for lunch. Possum sandwiches. C: Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this parrot what I photographed not half an hour ago from this wilde New Zealand habitat. O: Oh yes, the, uh, the Kea, Nestor Notabilis ..What's,uh...What's wrong with it? C: I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. 'E's dead, that's what's wrong with it! O: No, no, 'e's uh,...he's resting. C: Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now. O: No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Nestor Notabilis idn'it, ay? ...

"Darling did you put the cat out?" "Yes dear" Well, where is it" " In the boa constrictor " Crusader Rabbit points out that Australia doesn't just have poisonous things...no you can have your cat swallowed whole too. And if you are going to trip around the country, stay away from their fresh water reservoirs. It's amazing the number of people that fall in and choke to death on the dust. Related Link: Putting the cat out Related Link: They wont hurt you if you don't annoy them

Given my blog nom-de-plume it's not a far stretch to imagine I might like Tigers. So I smuggled three Siberian cubs in across the border and raised them from small cat size to, well, tiger size. Now, my back yard is a full traditional quarter acre. Even so, it's hardly 400 square miles of jungle territory. These guys are going to roam. Furthermore, my fence is only 1.8M high, and it isn't going to keep Hobbes, Tigger and Panteris contained. Now, I have trained them and they are very good. Very docile (unless aroused) and give them a scratch under the chin and they are putty. The neighbours on one side of my house are pretty relaxed about the whole thing. In fact, I think they feed Panteris on the side. I'm sure they had more goats last week. Anyway, the neighbours two door down on the other side are pretty uptight about the whole deal. They keep claiming their 2 year old 'babies' are at risk. Two Staffordshire bull terriers called Saint and Sinner. I...

The Tiger has been voted world's most popular animal. Some people like them for their majesty and grace, and others think they are cool to drink. We must wean China off Tiger Wine. I fully support Pepsi in expanding in true capitalist fashion into China with all speed. And their advertising slogan surely matches the promise of the Tiger Wine - " Pepsi - brings your ancestors back from the dead ." Related Link: Tiger Wine no Balm