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United Nations Peacekeeping Force Intervenes

Rumour has it a United Nations Peacekeeping force is being prepared for insertion, in an effort to keep the peace. Speculation is that Secretary General Ban Ki-moon has asked New Zealand ex-Prime Minister Helen Clark to take responsibility for the force, given her demonstrated experience and knowledge, paving the way for a more senior role in the United Nations if she can pull this assignment off.

Said Helen Clark: "This talk of war is counter-productive. I personally think a single state solution is what is required to resolve this. Simple amalgamation into one body would remove all issues about self-determination and who gets what. My job will be to make sure fighting is reduced, casualties are reduced, and once the smoke has cleared, rather than discussing our differences, we will see if we can simply create a single unified body under one local government"


OK, this post is obviously satirical - Helen Clark did not say those things. At least, I think she didn't. Or maybe I saw her name at the bottom of a letter to the editor?

Anyway, I doubt the United Nations could resolve this conflict, even with Clark at the helm. Until they can sort out the Congo or Darfur, they will not have the skills to navigate a potential Lower Hutt / Wellington City Council war. Besides, they've already allocated their budget for the year.

This post follows up from my first post - Robbing from the hoods, and discusses the looming war between Wellington City Council and the surrounding councils of Kapiti, Porirua, Lower Hutt, Upper Hutt, Manawatu and two Wairarapa Councils.

Wellington Mayor Kerry Prendergast has asked the regional councils to cough up several million dollars towards funding Wellington attractions. It hasn't dawned on her that they in turn could ask for several million dollars plus 10 cents towards funding regional attractions. Hah! Take that Wellington. I'll trade you your $1 million dollar Te Papa museum for a $600,000 wine trail in Martinborough and $400,000.10 for a Kapiti Island wildlife sanctuary. Keep the change.

Perhaps the other point to make is that if the regional councils are required to contribute funds, do they get some say over how the funds are spent?

I'll pay for the zoo food, if you give me 50 staff from Te Papa. That still leaves you with close to 500 staff to run Te Papa, and the carnivores eat well.

I believe this is how they funded the games in the Colosseum back in Roman Times. Hopefully, we are now civilised enough that we don't need to throw in Christians. Persecuting Curators sounds fairly similar to the untrained ear, and may satisfy the upsurge in paganism.

Anyway, I digress. I actually have a new point to make. A pre-emptive strike as it were. On one hand, this is currently a discussion about Wellington Council receiving regional funding. On the other, it could be the beginnings of a political play to bring to the agenda the amalgamation of the local councils into one single super council. Ogden threatens cutting off the water supply, Kerry counters with an incursion into the Petone strip, and suddenly the borders change. Maybe we do need the U.N.?

Let me therefore end with a quote from Wellington Chamber of Commerce chief executive Charles Finny:
"We think that having nine councils for a population of 450,000 people is absurd. If an amalgamation happened, funding problems would "just go away".
An interesting idea, and worth a debate. However, funding problems would not "just go away". Unless the super council felt it could raise rates arbitrarily, and with even more disdain for its rate payers, and their ability to weather increases well above the CPI.

If we rate payers are required to amalgamate, it would be a good opportunity to extract some concessions on spending caps and the funding of "non-core activities." I'd also be interested to see how regional representation could be maintained whilst gaining administrative efficiencies.

There is currently a Royal Commission looking into the present system of 7 local government authorities and a regional council in Auckland, with findings due to be presented 31 March 2009. Their conclusions may have far reaching impact on all New Zealand regions. Will we see peace and prosperity in our time?



Related Link: Razor Plan includes shaving regional councils

Previous Post: Robbing From The Hoods

Related Link: Royal Commission on Auckland Governance

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