Saturday, July 11, 2009

ZenTiger Lawyer versus Farmer

[Standard Lawyer Joke - Read at own risk, no responsibility accepted by blog, any relation to any lawyers, living or dead purely coincidental, and easily could have been a Wellington bureaucrat pretending to be a lawyer.]

A lawyer went duck hunting. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly gentleman asked him what he was doing. The lawyer responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, I'm going into retrieve it."

The old farmer replied. "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the country and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything!

The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things here in Canterbury. We settle small disagreements like this with the Three-Kick Rule."


The lawyer asked, "What is the Three-Kick Rule?"

The Farmer replied. "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."

The lawyer quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old man. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city slicker. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on his belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old goat, now it's my turn."

The old farmer smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the duck."


Unrelated Link: A bit of Father Ted - Going to America 1

1 comment(s):

squaredrive said...

Hmmmmm... y'know, if they used this '3 kicks' system for parliamentary select committee 'public consultation', National-Act could get their duck/Auckland Supercity far quicker than they thought. Just thinking aloud.

Mind you, they would need more traffic cops to ensure safety of the lines of punters outside ;)

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