Thursday, October 25, 2007

ZenTiger Tax Terminology

Labour are showing signs of changing their rhetoric around 'tax cuts'. They've been out of the question, even with a 9 billion dollar surplus. But with an election looming, and the stir generated by the Australian parties who largely agree the first $20K should not be taxed, I can see a few rabbits coming out of the hat.

Consequently, I dug up my old post (August 2005) of mine from SH on tax terminology:

Dr Cullen has pulled another billion dollars from his ass. (Assuming they deliver the surplus direct to his office via a donkey). He's immediately spent it, and voters are losing track of the technical term for their little windfall. Here is a brief list of key terms to keep it all clear:

Tax cut: the government takes less money from you than last week. This is not a Labour Policy (See Bribe).

Bribe: What Labour calls an opposition party's promise to take less tax from you.

Rebate: the government takes more money than it needs and then gives some back.

Relief: What Labour might offer after 6 years of increasing taxes. It is combined with Targeted Assistance.

Targeted assistance: the government takes some-one else's money and gives it to you because you deserve it more. This means you are a student or a parent, and this status is more important than what your salary actually is, or the assets you currently have.

Benefit: the government takes more money, and spends 15 million dollars in advertising so you know you can apply to get some back.

Rates: A tax levied by a council body, rather than a government body. Therefore it isn't really a tax.

Kyoto Windfall: The government capitalises on the clean green NZ image to gain Carbon Credits. And then realises we actually owe money after signing up for Kyoto. So it's us paying a tax to the rest of the world.

Petrol Tax: The governments commitment to boost the consolidated fund, and collect for the Kyoto Windfall.

GST: A tax that is added to other taxes once you have paid your income tax. For example, you pay rates and GST is added to that. You pay petrol taxes, and GST is added to that.

Unemployed Worker: Person who failed to pay union fees.

Sickness Beneficiary: Person who does not qualify for the unemployment benefit.

Plasma Screen: An interest free student loan, capitalised by a History Student.

Feltex Shares: An interest free student loan, capitalised by an Economics Student.

FTA: A Trade Agreement that is Free. In China, it is actually pronounced "Flee Trade Agreement" and it allows NZ businesses to flee overseas to lower the cost of production. The tax burden shifts to a smaller group of people left behind in NZ.

Tax Minimisation Scheme: The leading cause of migration to Australia.

Pensioner: Person who has been waiting a bloody long time for tax relief.

Please Note: Sweeping generalisations always tend to piss people off, and that is not my intention. I realise there are lots of deserving people caught up in Labour's poor implementation of policy. Many students rely on student loans for legitimate purposes, and I do not begrudge them that. Many beneficiaries have been out of a job and look hard. I do not begrudge them the support. Many sickness beneficiaries are incapacitated in some way that makes assistance vital. I certainly do not begrudge them that. Our society is rich enough to help those in need, and I support that.

I do however begrudge any abuse of the system, and even more, I begrudge that the government makes it harder for genuine cases to get genuine support. For example, the latest proposal for sickness beneficiaries to go to two doctors to prove eligibility for assistance - how hard does that make it for people that find it hard to get to the doctor in the first place? How many hours will be wasted by Doctors doubling up on paperwork instead of getting through the waiting lists? Madness people, and I'm just trying to point it out.

8 comment(s):

MathewK said...

Good ones Zen, love the 'Flee Trade...'

Greg said...

If Cullen is, as he says, so good at micro-managing the economy and possesses all the financial skill that implies why hadn't he made milions on the markets prior to becoming Min.Finc.?

Oh yeah, because he's a history PhD and all that implies.

fugley said...

GregB, because he's a history PhD and all that implies.

What does a history PhD imply? Someone smarter than you? Someone with an education? Someone not sucked in by fads?

Come on, please do tell.

And, while we're at it, what subject is your doctorate in?

ZenTiger said...

Cullen is intelligent. His PhD may well demonstrate that. However, Cullen is also arrogant. It's how the intelligence is used that can make arrogant people prone to make the most simplest of mistakes - like not seeking to gain an understanding of different views.

Surely, a person who understands history understands this?

Danyl said...

If Cullen is, as he says, so good at micro-managing the economy and possesses all the financial skill that implies why hadn't he made milions on the markets prior to becoming Min.Finc.?

I understand Dr Cullen is very comfortable financially - and its salient to point out that John Key didn't make 'millions on the markets', he made millions as head of FX for Merrills, two very different things. Brokers rarely make much money on the markets (even though they can execute trades effectively for free) - they make their money on commissions executing trades for others.

Its financially a very rewarding job - but its incredibly boring and very demanding. I'd rather be a history Professor any day.

It's no trick to make a lot of money - if what you want to do with your life is make a lot of money

- Citizen Kane.

Greg said...

the answer to your question is this: physiology.
It's irrelevent anyway. It's of no importance that Cullen has an award for bloody minded tenancity in history, or that Lockwood has a PhD in ruminant digestion, Nick Smith in engineering etc. In the end only ministerial competence matters.
Rob Muldoon's accounting background certainly didn't help!

Re. I feel that Key is implied to be a titan of capitalism by virtue of his job at Merril Lynch.
I think that is one of the questions of the age.
Who is the capitalist?
The money manager who creams a commission like Key at Merril Lynch or topically ANZ (reported $1billion nett yesterday) or is it the shareholders who hold MLW or ANZ securities??

fugley said...

So GregB, as I call you on Cullen's PhD, it suddenly becomes irrelevant, only ministerial competence counts.

So, why the fuck didn't you address that? Was it too hard an argument to mount?

Greg said...

fugley amicably inquired, "what subject is your doctorate in?"
The answer to that question, as I said above, is "physiology".
What is this 'call' thing? Is it like 'ownage' or 'pwned'?

As a rule I try to assume the best of other commenters. Commenters are intelligent and well intentioned people until proven otherwise. Even the dorks. Blogs are more humane and bearable that way.

As to Cullen's competence, he's enjoyed a global bull so it's difficult to fairly tease out as it would be for any other minister in his position.

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