"It really pisses me off to think they dicked around for a couple of hours while a little girl was dying," said family spokeswoman and Porirua Deputy Mayor Litea Ah Hoi.Some idiots are pointing the finger at St Johns for the death of a toddler. Some consider that the alleged murderous actions of the mother might have something to do with it too.
But I have conducted a crime scene investigation and can now unmask the real culprit. It is none other than (drumroll) Family spokeswoman and Porirua Deputy Mayor Litea Ah Hoi!
"What?", I hear you say. But this event occurred in Marton and that's miles away from Porirua. What on earth is the connection?
Let's go through the facts.
Fact: Another child has died in mysterious circumstances and a family spokesperson is quick to move the blame to the hard working and underfunded ambulance service.
Fact: There is no motive for a family spokesperson from PORIRUA to engage mouth before brain on an incident well out of her jurisdiction, unless she has something to hide.
Fact: Hand-wringing socialists such as this are always making such fatuous complaints, and yet they are the ones that are supposed to be solving the problem. At least, they argue that paying for such a person out of tax payer money is going to make a difference. If it hasn't made a difference, then she's to blame.
Fact: My points may be total hogwash, but given that Porirua Deputy Mayor Litea Ah Hoi expects to be taken seriously using the same hogwash, surely we can judge her inability to prevent this crime on the same basis? I haven't bothered to check any facts on her stellar career. How does she like it?
Fact: We don't actually have any facts on the case at the moment, other than my amazingly reasonable deductions on the stupidity and insensitivity of Porirua Deputy Mayor Litea Ah Hoi.
Solution: Fire this person, and end the role of family spokesperson. Use the money to fund St Johns. They are hard working folk, and besides, it was actually a subcontracted GP that made the first visit.
Why not throw in an unfounded complaint about GP's as well? I thought family spokespeople were believers in "equal opportunity"? Surely, not also sledging the GP organisation shows a terrible bias, and is probably in contravention of anti-discrimination conventions of the United Nations.
After firing her, send her to the Hague for trial. If we can't pin the murder on her, let's at least quarantine her to prevent the spread foot in mouth disease.
If the ambulance is at the bottom of a cliff, it's because people like her put it there. It's time for people like us to put her back in her box.
Related Link: Ambulance at bottom of cliff
Update: Oswald in triage
Do I put my satire tag on this one, or leave it? It's my all purpose word for stretching my point to just beyond the bounds of credibility, that area where truth is too often stranger than fiction, and yet fiction seems to illustrate the truth so well.
ReplyDeleteAt the least, I can own up to not liking the way I've framed this as an "us versus them" issue, but always one to try different approaches to making my point, I thought it worth exploring.
Sure, there may have been some mistakes made with the time taken to get the girl to hospital, but we cannot even be sure of that until we hear the whole story. Doesn't diminish my respect for ambulance personnel.
And whatever the story, the actions of the emergency services were not deliberate.
On the other hand, it is quite possible the way the girl was injured was deliberate.
Even that is conjecture at this stage, as I haven't seen a full report.
Time for now to sit back and wait for the full story to come out.
St John's statement can be found here. It makes it very clear to me that St John's were not "dicking around" - they were working very hard to keep a badly injured little girl alive.
ReplyDeleteI submit that your post is most definitely not satire.
Thanks for that information.
ReplyDeleteSeems like my "facts" are remaining quite reasonable.
I have no idea why a "spokesperson for family" seems to think it appropriate to lay into St Johns when there are far more appropriate targets to abuse when looking at a situation without all the facts.
So it does seem apt to bounce the blame right on back.
Definitely not satire, Zen.
ReplyDelete"If the ambulance is at the bottom of a cliff, it's because people like her put it there. It's time for people like us to put her back in her box."
Amen to that! It's time people spoke up against these apologists for violence and the grievance-mongers, and if that's "racist"--then so be it.
I'm getting to be comfortable with that tag, since it's used so often to deflect criticism from the real culprits.