Sunday, July 18, 2010

Andrei Mad Science

PH = √ (e2 + ve2)(d2) + (cg + dr)2 + π {(4<s>2)(4<p>2)}2 + (vi + t + te)2 + {(4<c>2)(42)}2

(e) is eye contact (1=none; 5=direct) 5; (ve) is verbal greeting (1=totally inappropriate; 5=totally appropriate) 5; (d) is Duchenne smile - smiling in eyes and mouth, plus symmetry on both sides of face, and slower offset (1=totally non-Duchenne smile (false smile); 5=totally Duchenne) 5; (cg) completeness of grip (1=very incomplete; 5=full) 5; (dr) is dryness of hand (1=damp; 5=dry) 4; (s) is strength (1= weak; 5=strong) 3; (p) is position of hand (1=back towards own body; 5=other person's bodily zone) 3; (vi) is vigour (1=too low/too high; 5=mid) 3; (t) is temperature of hands (1=too cold/too hot; 5=mid) 3; (te) is texture of hands (5=mid; 1=too rough/too smooth) 3; (c) is control (1=low; 5=high) 3; (du) is duration (1= brief; 5=long) 3.

Can you guess what this is?

No - Stuff has the story (Sans formula) here.

Do you think in the real world this has any meaning or significance what so ever? Or is it a case of academic double talk being used to blind the gullable with science?

This appears to be the original press release

2 comment(s):

ZenTiger said...

That's not all scientists have been working on.

Some think they have answered the age old question: Chicken or Egg

I suspect they haven't factored in some age old wisdom: Never count your chickens before they hatch.

Seán said...

Sorry Andrei, but this is brilliant stuff. It's a Seinfeld episode brought to real life. As if the handshake wasn't difficult enough, can you imagine the thought process confusion in Europe where pecks on the cheek are the norm? But differ between countries - 1, 2 or 3? FF or MF or in some cultures even MM. And then there is a (anglo-american) foreigner in the midst (of their own country). Kiwi? Where is that? There can be a thesis on this.

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